It didn’t come immediately, but soon after deciding to pursue a relationship, my now fiancé and I started reading Scripture together. What began as weekly Bible studies soon evolved into intense 2-hour long discussions of systematic theology and all the textual proofs you can think of. Eventually, we took to reading a chapter of Scripture a night. Shortly after that, we decided to read a Psalm together each morning and then go through a book, one chapter at a time, at night. That’s what our routine looks like now – reading and praying over a Psalm every morning and reading and discussing a chapter of another book of the Bible each evening.
I’m not saying that to make my fiancé and I sound extra pious – we’re not extra pious, I promise – but I am trying to express the importance of Christian couples reading Scripture together.
Not only is reading God’s Word together commanded in the Bible itself, but it also efficacious for your sanctification (both as an individual and as a couple) and your joy in the Lord.
So yes, Christian couples really do need to be reading the Bible together. Check out some of the detailed reasons I provide below.
“Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her, that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that He might present the church to Himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish.” Ephesians 5:25-27.
I once heard it said that the best thing you can do for your spouse (or significant other, for that matter) is become more like Jesus. How true it is. And the best way to become more like Jesus is to spend more time in the Word. The Bible makes it clear that the Holy Spirit sanctifies us by the words right in front of us (John 6:33). It’s an incredible truth that God has ordained to grow us as His people in Christ by the power of the Holy Spirit interacting with words recorded millennia ago.
Engaging with Scripture on a regular basis also allows you to become more familiar with God’s statutes. This will equip you to walk in increasing holiness. What is more, you will be more able to help your spouse along in their sanctification, pointing out areas they may be blind to in which they struggle with sin and praying with and for them. Sharpening one another is a beautiful aspect of a Christian marriage (Proverbs 27:17), but as you do this, be careful not to nag; let’s take the logs out of our own eyes first, friends (Luke 6:42).
As believers, our delight is in the Law of the Lord (Psalm 1:2). Truly, God is our greatest treasure, and His Word is our highest good. May we share those heavenly delights with our significant others, as we strive towards increased holiness.
My fiancé and I love the song “How Firm a Foundation” with its lovely reminder that there is no firmer foundation on which our affections could be built than our mutual love for God’s Word.
“How firm a foundation, ye saints of the Lord, is laid for your faith in His excellent Word! What more can He say than to you He hath said, to you who to Jesus for refuge have fled? Fear not, I am with you; O be not dismayed. I am they God and will still give thee aid. I’ll strengthen thee, help thee, and cause thee to stand, upheld by My righteous, omnipotent hand.”
Reading the Bible together will strengthen your relationship. If you’re dating, it will cause you be more intentional and prompt you to have big discussions that will help you two flesh out whether you share the same values or not. If you’re engaged, it will give you a greater appreciation for your season of engagement (you can read more about that here) and provide you with more accurate expectations of what marriage will be like. And if you’re married, reading Scripture together will deepen your spiritual communion, strengthen your bond, endow you with a greater capacity to forgive your spouse’s shortcomings, and provide you with a more profound understanding of romance and marital sexuality. …And that’s just the beginning of the list!
Christian couples, reading the Bible together is not just a nice little activity you can do. It’s the most important thing (along with prayer) that you can do for your relationship.
Do you and your significant other have a spiritual routine? Let me know in the comments section below! I’d love to hear all the ways you and your person spend time in the Word together.